Day 27 – Which movies or tv shows do you think are the most accurate portrayals of parenthood?
parenthood. honestly one of the best shows ever. in my humble opinion. it deals with things head. and most of the situations and reactions are quite plausible. almost like real people acting like real people.
Day 28 – What size family do you come from, what size family do you want, and why?
i grew up in a family of five (one older sister, one younger brother) with an extensive extended family on my moms side including 13 cousins. my dads side there were no other kids. at least not until i was 24 or so. (big age difference between dad and his youngest sister). mere comes from a family of 7 (2 younger sisters and two younger brothers). i always thought two, maybe three kids. but lately m and i both find ourselves thinking perhaps we would like more. i love being a parent. even when it is hard and exhausting and just getting through the day is tough. and i believe we are crazy kind, compassionate good people. i am very happy with my family the way it is now but sometimes, sometimes it seems like another one. or two. would only make things more fun. so we will see what happens over the next few years.
Day 25 – What did you want to be when you grew up? Why and/or how did that change over time?
i wanted to be a couple of different things actually and i was pretty set on each of them. when i was really young i wanted to be a dolphin trainer. i was fascinated by dolphins and other sea life. i even dressed up as a dolphin trainer – complete with a cardboard dolphin jumping through a hoop – when i was in kindergarten. over a few years this became a marine biologist which sounds a less hooky. not entirely sure why this love for the intelligent water world creatures diminished but it did. around 4th or 5th grade i decided i wanted to be a doctor. an oncologist specifically. i drew pictures of tumors. i read grey’s anatomy. i built models of the human body. i even tried to (unsuessfully) grow a tumor on a carrot in enrichment. in high school i still liked the idea of being a doctor but i started writing a lot and thought that perhaps that would be a nice career choice. my first year of college (at a school that was akin to a trust fund hippie summer camp) i very much believed i would be a writer. and then i transferred to a more reality based college and went pre-med. only problem was my lack of math skills. so when i finally went to very large university to finish my education i wasn’t sure exactly what i wanted to do but i knew i wanted to be involved in social justice issues. someone mentioned law and i decided that sounded like a valid place to try to make changes within the system so i went to law school. never really with the intention of practicing law. and while in law school i also decided to get a masters in public health policy and administration. what did i want to do? well my dream job was a a judge on the inter-american court of human rights. far fetched i know but it would be amazing. instead i ended up volunteering and then working at a hiv/aids non-profit in the legal department where i started an immigration clinic. this became my new passion. i left there and started working with an immigration attorney while finishing law school and then shortly thereafter. but alas since she was unable to compensate me i had to look elsewhere for stable employment and i ended up at a huge legal publisher in a number of different positions (none of which i really enjoyed) while taking a few cases on the side. and that brings us up to now where i am officially a stay at home mom. and honestly – this is the best job i have ever had.
Day 26 – What is/are the best piece(s) of parenting advice you’ve gotten or can give others?
people say so many different things to you before you are pregnant. while you are pregnant. and once the kid or kids are out it certainly doesn’t diminish. of all of the things i have been told i think the best was: just go with it. if you are doing the best that you know how things will be okay (even if they might not seem like it at the moment). another one that i like is to get to know and love your children right where they are right now and try not to dwell too much on the future. it will be here before you know it.
yeah so i’m not so good at this non-challenge thing. i’m okay with that. i’m picking back up now and we will see if i can finish out the month…
Day 23 – What are your favorite activities to do with your kid(s)?
i like doing most things with my kids. except playing pok.e.mon which happens to be hooks new obsession. i indulge him on occasion but really not my thing. i love reading with hook and having him read to me. we have started running together and are doing our first 5k together tomorrow. i love listening to all of the creative and fun things he has to say.
as for the wigglers i love watching them see or do new things. like the other day magoo was running his hands back and forth over and over on the different textures of the play mat. you could tell he was fascinated by it. or when cindy lou figured out how to drag herself around army crawl style. i love being with them and just remembering how great it is to experience something new all the time (before we grow up and become jaded and afraid of new things :-))
Day 24 – What are your favorite activities to do without your kid(s)?
i love to run. it makes me feel whole and refreshed and reenergized. it gives me time to think about everything and nothing all at once.
in cleaning up i just found an unopened box of b.rav.elle. I would be happy to pass it along. expiration is 06/11 but i’m not sure how stringent that date is. let me know if anyone is in need…
i can’t even imagine what lis and her family are going through right now.
if you have a moment please go to Built in Birth Control and let them know you are thinking of them at this horrible time.
the wigglers are getting big. and are so much fun! of course they always were fun in one way or another but now they actually play with toys and belly laugh and roll around and stuff. always nice to feel like there is some reward for all the effort put forth the first few months!
and now back to our regularly scheduled programming…
eat your vegetables. and some other stuff… is it horrible that i can’t think of the most important lesson i learned from her? eek i am feeling not so good about this right now…
okay, perhaps the most important lesson i learned (eventually) was do what you need to do for yourself to be happy. this was not something that was exhibited early on in my life. my parents marriage was not bad but i’m not entirely sure it was good either. i remember my mother being frustrated and unhappy a lot. when i went away to college my mother decided to move out. and then back in. and then out again and to get a divorce. i am not one to advocate divorce but i certainly don’t advocate unhappiness either. it was a hard time for my father and my siblings and myself but ultimately it was best for everyone. and now i see that this was a very important lesson – as hard as it was to experience at the time. not that one should only think of themselves but they should definitely not stay in a situation that makes them miserable either. fortunately my relationship with m is nothing like this but i think it is a good lesson for all areas of life.
***last night i thought about this a lot after i had posted. as almost all mothers and daughters we had our issues while i was in my teens but we are pretty close now and we tend to have really honest conversations. i learned much more from my mother than i probably give her credit for. she may not have been a feminist or politically involved but she taught me right from wrong and she taught me to care about those less fortunate and those in need. she instilled a love of reading in me and a devotion to family. my mom was the one that was always there. when i think about trips we took or field trips or the like it was always her that was there. i should give her more credit. the way that i was raised – both the good and the bad – have made me who i am. and that doesn’t seem to be such a bad thing. ***